Free Essay

Make Friends

In: Social Issues

Submitted By suren15
Words 1776
Pages 8
Techniques on getting people to like you
Today I am going to share on how to get people to like you. Or more exact, I am going to teach you on how to make your best first impression. I will give you numerous way to make people to like you and I will be covering on rapport building, mirroring, matching, representational systems and rapport mistakes. The first technique we are going to cover is rapport building. The definition of rapport is the development of a close and harmonious relationship in which two or more people understand each other and can communicate well. Most people try to build rapport by being nice to someone, followed by a sharing of common experiences. By doing this you’re saying, people like people like themselves, and these are the reasons I’m like you. These common techniques can work some of the time but definitely not all of the time. Building Rapport is normally the difference between getting someone to quickly like you, or not. I’ll teach you know what to look for and how to effortlessly gain rapport with anyone.
When you are with someone you trust, you may not notice, but you are naturally mirroring him or her. Mirroring is defined as when you copy someone else’s behavior; their movement, body position, hand gestures, tone of language, etc. A clear example of mirroring is seen when a couple naturally completes each other’s sentences. They are so in tune they actually seem to read the others thoughts. What most people do not realize is that mirroring is a two way street. You can actually mirror a person slightly and get them to feel closer to you naturally. When mirroring people it is very important that it stays outside of their perception. Be very subtle by copying breathing, the speed in which they are talking, and a few of the phrases they are using. Don’t make it obvious that you are mirroring them. The first thing you want to mirror when meeting someone is their breathing pattern. When a person inhales their shoulders rise. They exhale when the shoulder’s fall and when they speak. Monitor these two area and copy them. Now match the speed and tone of their voice. Pay particular attention to their Volume, Rhythm, Tempo, and Clarity. You could also study color changes, muscle movements and lower lip movements, but I’ll keep it simple for now. Albert Mehrabian, a researcher in the 1950’S, found that the total impact of what you say is 7% verbal (words only), 38% vocal (tone of voice, inflection) and 55% nonverbal. 6o — 8o% of the impact made is through what a person gathers in regards to your body language. Women rely more on the tone of voice and body language than what words are being used.So you have copied the breathing patterns and tone of voice. Now you will become the person you’re meeting. You can mirror their: * Breathing Pattern * Voice * Posture * Gesturing * Blink rate * Representational System
And I am going to cover what that exactly means. While you are mirroring, they will almost never notice. Just don’t mimic their gestures while they are speaking. Instead wait until you are talking to mirror those gestures. If you want to be positive they won’t catch on wait to mirror them after a few seconds. Now that you are sitting as they sit, with the same posture. And, are following the tempo of their voice, breathing, etc. It is now time to go over what I mean by Representational System’s. Humans store memories as a series of images, sounds and feelings. As a person talks they will choose a representational system and give you a clue to whether they are remembering a story through images, sounds and feelings.
If you match their representational systems a person will feel completely in sync with you. Here is an example, someone says: “Let me show you how bright blue the sky was.” Your respond should be: “I see! The blue sky is very bright and beautiful.” Here I am matching the fact that the person with whom I’m speaking, is in a visual representational system. Keep this up and they’ll soon say, it’s as if you are reading my mind. The reason they’ll say this is that everything you say will be instantly understandable, because her mind is prepared to understand your visual language. Here is some common rapport mistakes. By mirroring and matching you will really stand out from the pack. Here I provide a few more tip’s that will get you building relationships even quicker. Don’t try too hard to build rapport. If you try too hard you will come off as being desperate. People do not like desperate people. If there is a true connection it will come with ease on its own. Don’t be overly nice. Only be so nice that it is not interfering with the free flow of feelings and ideas. Here are the other common rapport mistakes. People are comfortable being either in charge, subordinate, or equal in conversations. Let them be the way they want to be. People try to develop deep rapport vs. wide rapport. This is when a person latches onto one common interest and focuses rapport building only on that subject. Wide rapport can only be developed when you share many common experiences. Wide rapport are much better than deep rapport. You can’t make the mistake of offering too much information. You show people you are interested by giving them reasons to interject and speak about their stories.You must convey to the other person, that you are worth getting to know. This is accomplished by changing up your interest in them throughout the first meeting. Remember, people want what they think they can’t easily get. You need to suspend the judgements, and to listen to a person with an attitude that they are a great person and one worth knowing. You can help generate these feelings by imagining that they are someone you already admire. Now I'm gonna tell you on how to find out a person is in-charge or subordinate. You can recognize if someone feels comfortable in an authority, subordinate, or equality role very easy. When you shake their hand if they place their hand on top palm down they are enacting control and vice versa. If they shake on an equal level they feel equal to you. Also the first person to look away is subordinate. And the pressure they apply tells much also. Allow them to keep their role, but move slowly toward equality. Here is how to create a wide rapport. The more stories you tell about different topics, ideas, and themes the more they will sense your entire personality. This will also make the person comfortable enough to feel as if they can discuss any of their thoughts with you.
Using Fractionated Rapport Technique’s will really hook a person. Here is how to do it. Focus on the person by giving them your complete attention. Then let your eyes drift away a bit, acting briefly distracted. If they raise their voice or in some way try to attract your full attention, you know you’re properly building rapport. When you then fully give them your attention, they will be deeply comforted and trust you more. The use of rapport hooks can allow you to easily get a person interested in you. By creating rapport hooks you will force the other person to struggle to build rapport with you taking the pressure off of yourself. You create a rapport hook by starting an interesting story and then before you talk about how you were able to get through the problem you say “to cut a long story short everything worked itself out.” Another create Rapport Hook, is the introduction Rapport Hook. It’s a basic layout includes interesting comment, interesting comment open ended question. Here is a sample scenario at a party in which the person using the rapport hook knows nobody. Imagine if he or she walked up to someone and say, “Excuse me, between finding out how much money my broker lost me and my new born, I forgot to eat today. What looks good on the buffet?” What that person did here is that he or she gave the stranger many interesting thing to talk about. Many people like talking about children. Many people like talking about the stock market, gambling, sports, etc. they all are the same thing. And people like talking about food and also by asking what looks good on the buffet, they have to give an answer other than a regular, boring yes or no.
Lastly, I want all of you to know that active listening does not work. Many people use a technique that is called Active Listening. Through active listening we are told to hear what a person says and then reorganize those words and repeat them back in a different way. They may say “I spent a beautiful day walking through the museum with my baby in my arms admiring each brightly painted picture. A day like that shows you how colorful the world can be. What a great world it is to bring up a child.”
This is the incorrect response based off of active listening, “I hear you and what better a place to take an infant than a museum. They always smell so clean. You don’t have to worry about them catching anything there. It’s one of the few places you can take an infant and not feel as if they’ll get sick.” In this conversation many mistakes were made. The first person is a visual speaker, a person that moves towards goals, refers to their baby and has a soft tone. The second, while trying to find a general interest, speaks in audio and kinetic terms, moves away from problems, refers to the “infant” and even though they’re speaking of a similar experience they are definitely not seeing it in the same way. Here is the correct response based off of the matching technique, “I see what you’re saying. I spent many a beautiful day with my baby in my arms, walking through the museums and parks, enjoying each bright and colorful day. I used to dress her in a little pink outfit and paint the town. What else did you see that day?” Active listening can make the person believe you missed the point, that you have misunderstood them. A technique known as tracking back will gain you much better results. By tracking back you actually speak in their language using phrases that they have used.…...

Similar Documents

Premium Essay

Friends

...Different Types of Friend; classification essay Anyone who has spent time with friends will notice that each one has a special personality all of their own. Friends, have different traits that make up their personalities. We have researched this phenomenon in detail and classified friends into different categories. The three kinds of personality are honest, loyal, and caring friends. Friends actually may have similar interest, but this way there are the way they interact and show their up personality type. The first personality type is called honesty. These actions mean the honesty friend is easy to keep our secrets. They usually adapt to their experience and are generally cheerful. An honest person always gives us the truth statement even if it’s not always what you want to hear. As long as you close with this person, you will feel comfort because the lies aren’t good in your friendship. The next notable is loyalty type. These are the more quiet and shy friends but in their physical they have a big loyal to you. They don’t care how rich or poor you are, how bad or well you are, they just comfort to be friend with you. They always accompany you if you have trouble in your life, and generally they also will solve your problem. In this type, they will never let you down when you when times are hard. They may be what you call a best friend. The last type is care. A care person expresses their type with pay some attention. Whether you are happy or mad, they will know how......

Words: 364 - Pages: 2

Free Essay

Friends

...Friends (stylized as F•R•I•E•N•D•S) is an American sitcom created by David Crane and Marta Kauffman, which aired on NBC from September 22, 1994 to May 6, 2004. The series revolves around a group of friends in Manhattan. The series was produced by Bright/Kauffman/Crane Productions, in association with Warner Bros. Television. The original executive producers were Crane, Kauffman and Kevin S. Bright, with numerous others being promoted in later seasons. Kauffman and Crane began developing Friends under the title Insomnia Cafe in November/December 1993. They presented the idea to Bright, with whom they had previously worked, and together they pitched a seven-page treatment of the series to NBC. After several script rewrites and changes, including a second title change to Friends Like Us, the series was finally named Friends and premiered on NBC's coveted Thursday 8:30 pm timeslot. Filming for the series took place at Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, California in front of a live studio audience. The series finale (the 236th episode), airing on May 6, 2004, was watched by 51.1 million American viewers,[1] making it the fourth most watched series finale in television history[2][3] and the most watched episode of the decade.[4] Friends received positive reviews throughout its run, becoming one of the most popular sitcoms of all time. The series won many awards and was nominated for 63 Primetime Emmy Awards. The series, an instant hit from its debut, was also very successful in......

Words: 386 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friend

...Crazy, Hilarious, Amazing, Cute, Friend: Kasey Mae Hayes Kasey Mae Hayes is not only my neighbor, but my best friend. She lives right down the street from me and I've known her for as long as I can remember. We both play soccer together and plan to play lacrosse and track together in high school, too. This year we have grown to become very close and so have our families she has one older sibling, Kyle. Her mom is an art teacher and her dad works from home. She is in my grade and although she's shorter than me, she's older, and I look up to her. I admire the fact that I can trust her, she can always put me in a good mood, and she is very confident in herself. One thing I admire about her is that I can trust her. Whatever I tell her, stays with her. She never gives my secrets away. This year, especially, has been hard for me. Things at home haven't been the best. I told her what had been going on and she was there for me. She said she would never tell anyone and it wasn't her place to, it was my personal business. Another way we have a trustworthy relationship is we tell each other everything even when it has to do with others. She also is always there for me and always gives good advice and supports me in whatever I do. For example, I really got to know a certain boy this year and really cared for him but he hurt me so many times and I didn't deserve it. Kasey was there for me and she had my back even though the boy is one of her best friends too. By far, she is one of......

Words: 873 - Pages: 4

Premium Essay

Friends

...Everyone needs good friends that can hold uphold good characteristics and Christian values. The characteristics of a good friend are honesty, love, service, loyalty, and receiving. •Honesty - Will you tell me the truth? The best gift that someone can give me is honest affirmation (don’t patronize me) and honest correction. (For more on this idea read this post). Not everyone has the “right” to speak into my life this way. This right is earned by the demonstration of the second characteristic… •Love – Will you love me when I’m at the top of my game? Will you love me when I’m in a slump? Love that transcends the “seasons” of life is the “stuff” that genuine friendship is made of! Some people call this “unconditional love.” •Service - Will you help me? Friends help one another. These last few weeks we’ve been blessed by our friends who have helped with meals, prep for the yard sale, words of encouragement, babysitting, etc. To all of you, we are grateful to have friends like you. Thank you for your help. •Loyalty - Will you “stick it out” with me? Will you defend me when I’m being attacked? Will you stick up for me when I’m not there? A friend is someone who would not have to change the conversation when you walk up. •Receiving - Will you receive from me? A friendship is only as strong as the neediest friend. If you’re always helping me but I do not help you, in time you will grow weary of me! BUT when you help me, and allow me to help you we strengthen one another and......

Words: 279 - Pages: 2

Free Essay

Friends

...Friends are people whom we turn to when our spirits need a lift. They are always by our side through thick and thin. They stand beside us even when our disposition is not perfectly right and will fight for us if we are oppressed. Therefore, it is clear that friends play a vital role in shaping who we are today. But what qualities exactly do we need to look for in a friend? A friend should always be caring towards you. He or she should take interest in your problems no matter how big or petty your problem may be. A friend should be able to sit beside you and encourage you to keep your chin up even when everyone else is against you. A friend’s empathy and lovingness will also replenish your worn-out soul and will make you realize how important a friend really is. Apart from that, a friend should be an honest person. An honest friend will dissipate any worries that he or she is lying towards you. A friend’s honesty will enable you to trust his or she’s opinion when it comes to telling you the truth about yourself. For example, an honest friend will remand you on your declining grades and will ask you to work harder while a dishonest friend will see it with a blind eye. Therefore, an overall improvement in yourself will be noticeable if you have an honest friend. Moreover, a friend should be generous both emotionally and knowledge wise. A friend who is generous ought to be able to connect with you and provide emotional support. He or she should also be generous when it comes......

Words: 421 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friend

...Everyone needs good friends that can hold uphold good characteristics and Christian values. The characteristics of a good friend are honesty, love, service, loyalty, and receiving. •Honesty - Will you tell me the truth? The best gift that someone can give me is honest affirmation (don’t patronize me) and honest correction. (For more on this idea read this post). Not everyone has the “right” to speak into my life this way. This right is earned by the demonstration of the second characteristic… •Love – Will you love me when I’m at the top of my game? Will you love me when I’m in a slump? Love that transcends the “seasons” of life is the “stuff” that genuine friendship is made of! Some people call this “unconditional love.” •Service - Will you help me? Friends help one another. These last few weeks we’ve been blessed by our friends who have helped with meals, prep for the yard sale, words of encouragement, babysitting, etc. To all of you, we are grateful to have friends like you. Thank you for your help. •Loyalty - Will you “stick it out” with me? Will you defend me when I’m being attacked? Will you stick up for me when I’m not there? A friend is someone who would not have to change the conversation when you walk up. •Receiving - Will you receive from me? A friendship is only as strong as the neediest friend. If you’re always helping me but I do not help you, in time you will grow weary of me! BUT when you help me, and allow me to help you we strengthen one another and the......

Words: 279 - Pages: 2

Free Essay

Friend

...To everybody, friend plays an important part in our life, so topics which involve in friend become more and more common. There is a debate that whether people who have different interests and personalities cannot be friend. From my perspective, I agree that people should make friend with the people who have same interests and personalities. The first reason why I hold this view is that it must be easier for two people to communicate with each other when they have same interests and personalities. On one hand people always focus on what they are interested in, so they will catch all opportunities to understand it, including communication, on the other hand, the chat with tow people who have same interests and personalities can avoid the embarrassment of silent. I will take an example of myself. Once I went out with tow friends, one has the same interests and personalities to me, while the other has diverse interests and personalities from us. From my own feeling, I would like to talk with the former one better. Another aspect can never be ignore is that it is possible for two people with diverse interests and personalities to produce divergence and contradiction. In other words, two people with different interests and personalities may have two ideas to same things, so when they stand in an opposite opinion, their friendship perhaps confront with a big challenge, and this challenge possesses destructiveness. It is really possible to cause their friendship to be end.......

Words: 384 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friends

...common characteristics. First of all love and friendship is relationship, which requires time, effort and many other characteristics, which form mutual relationship. Both, love and friendship assume emotional involvement, care, respect and devotion. Both feelings undergo transformations with the flow of time and go through different stages. You can have several friends but situations of being in loving relationships with several people are very rare and are regarded rather like deviation, than something normal. This is one of the differences between love and friendship. Another incontestable difference between love and friendship is sexual attraction. Friendship usually doesn’t assume any sexual attraction at all and most forms of love (in the context of relationship between people who are in love) include sexual attraction. Love can be reciprocal or not, and in this field it’s expressed more like an attitude. It’s hard to imagine reciprocal friendship. It either exists or not. Friendship is rather a relationship, which emerges on the joint of several spheres i.e. emotional, mental, physical, etc. Like we could make sure, it’s hard to explain the notion of love or friendship. It becomes even harder, when we start talking about the true love. There is no one distinct definition of true love. It’s a subjective feeling and means different things for different people. Like any feeling or attitude, it has an empirical nature and can be rather felt than explained. It’s a common......

Words: 569 - Pages: 3

Free Essay

Friends

...to define the word friend became a much more complex task than it was years earlier. According to the ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle the definition of friend is "A single soul dwelling in two bodies." Aristotle wrote widely about the conception and importance of true friendship as a determinant of meaningful living. However his definition of friend is definitely not the one we are having these days through social media, the concept of personal and face to face interactions seems to be less important as time goes by and social media takes over. Social media plays a big role in our daily life; we keep in touch with our loved ones and get to know about what others are doing “enhancing” our social lives. However, this make us think about how real and meaningful is our social life on the web. The people we pretend to be on social media is not the ones we are on real life, this being one of the major issue with the modern social relationships we develop these days. When communication is not personal it can be manipulated easily, allowing the sender to direct the message just the way he intends to. Loosing emotions and meaning in the process, different that what can be seen on real conversations and interactions. Researchers of Harvard university who performed a study during 2013 based on teenagers, concluded that social media is indeed affecting the way kids look at friendship and intimacy these days. The average teenager has about 300 Facebook friends and about 79......

Words: 488 - Pages: 2

Free Essay

Friends

...Friends  Friends are people whom we turn to when our spirits need a lift. They are always by our side through thick and thin. They stand beside us even when our disposition is not perfectly right and will fight for us if we are oppressed. Therefore, it is clear that friends play a vital role in shaping who we are today. But what qualities exactly do we need to look for in a friend? A friend should always be caring towards you. He or she should take interest in your problems no matter how big or petty your problem may be. A friend should be able to sit beside you and encourage you to keep your chin up even when everyone else is against you. A friend’s empathy and lovingness will also replenish your worn-out soul and will make you realize how important a friend really is. Apart from that, a friend should be an honest person. An honest friend will dissipate any worries that he or she is lying towards you. A friend’s honesty will enable you to trust his or she’s opinion when it comes to telling you the truth about yourself. For example, an honest friend will remand you on your declining grades and will ask you to work harder while a dishonest friend will see it with a blind eye. Therefore, an overall improvement in yourself will be noticeable if you have an honest friend. Moreover, a friend should be generous both emotionally and knowledge wise. A friend who is generous ought to be able to connect with you and provide emotional support. He or she should also be......

Words: 425 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friends

...Friends: 1) Introduction 2) Quality 3) Information Introduction information: School MATES - He may be same class or he may be junior or senoor to me, then we call me as school mate, COllege - same group or other grop and he may be junior or senior to me, then call him as college mate. Class -- same class and may be same section or other section, then we call him as class mate Room - if someone stays with you, then you call it as room mate Tution - all goes to tution, i dont know about him like what class and what college Bench - and same bench in school or college childhood Friend - who you know since childhood close - a close friend is someone you can talk to, and do things with, but you dont always spend time with them best causual - say hi or bye to someone, i dont know about him and also even he doesnt know about me confidential - With whom you share secrets like letters, we can trust him so hwe will not share withg anyone It may be one from your existing friends or it may be some other persons. In some cases, for some people sister or brother may be the best friend it's important to have friends that you can talk to and share experiences with. My friends make me laugh, but I know I can also rely on them whenever I need help or support. I met most of my freinds at school so we are almost at the same age,some tohers I met through my work who are a little older or younger than me. Good friends don't bring up things that embarrass...

Words: 312 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friend

...word as my topic. That word is friend. According to Merriam Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, the definition of the word friend is one attached to another by affection or esteem, acquaintance, and one that is not hostile. In other words, friends are people who love each other in a friendship way. In my opinion, many people see friendship as a bond that is all about having a lot of things in common, spending time together, and hanging out with each other. A friendship is a relationship that does not only occur between friends, but it might also exists among classmates, co-workers, siblings, parents, neighbors, and etc. The definition of this word as defined in the dictionary is acceptable and meaningful but not completely adequate. In my opinion, the meaning of the word friend means more that what is defined in the dictionary. First of all, I do not think an acquaintance should be considered as a friend but the acquaintances could become friends later. For instance, the classmates or co-workers could be your acquaintances because you might know a little bit about them such as their names, their ages, and where they are from. Most of the time you usually see them or communicate with them in the class or at the workplace or maybe you see them at some other places else too because there is one thing called coincidence which generally happens everywhere, but you do not actually spend time together outside of the classroom or the workplace like real friends do. Second of all,......

Words: 1124 - Pages: 5

Premium Essay

Friends

...always told me to be careful when choosing your friends and remember that not everyone is your friend. There are three different kinds of “friends” in this life. I classify them according to how well I know them and how well they know me. We encounter each of them every day, whether it be at school, home, or through social media. First, there are the "social media friends" generally known as the person behind the computer screen. Next, there are "acquaintance friends" classmates or short-term friend. Lastly, we have "best friends" our true friends. Social media sites such as Instagram or twitter have “followers” who are people behind their cellphones liking your pictures, commenting on your facebook statuses, but you do not really know who they are. You do not really talk to that person in person, this are different social media friends. Secondly, friends I call "acquaintances." This is because they are closer than your Instagram followers or facebook friends, but they nowhere near as close as your best friend. Acquaintances are usually classmates who evolve into "friends" through social media or hanging out here and there. You typically know the acquaintances name, a little of their family history, and usually have several things in common. Lastly your best friend, you probably grew up together as children. They know everything about you. Just as you know everything about them. You consider them to be like family. "A true friend will see you through when others see that you......

Words: 301 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Friends

...Four years ago, as I have previously stated in my personal speech, I met a wonderful person who came into my life and made a big difference. When I was about to give up on life because of health problems and because I lost my sister from Sickle Cell, the most wonderful person walked right into my life. You see all she said was hello, and that goes along way. When i'm sad she's there, when i'm burdened down with problems she is there. Even though she doesnt know anything about music when i'm upset about a song, or if my choir is not sounding like I want them to sound she is there. So my definition of a friend is her. She epitimizes what a friend is suppose to be. Even though now we are more than friends she still has never left my side. We may argue because i'm so busy, and we may fight because sometimes I have to drive four or five hours just to play for a choir and drag her along, but she is there. Sometimes when i'm sitting in my office thinking, and worrying about something I just pick up the phone and it seems as if all of my problems go away. When she is in need of something she doesn’t even have to ask. Every weekend is special because now she is at LSU in Baton Rouge, so we take turns visiting each other every weekend. So I end by telling you a little story. A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs......

Words: 543 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

Friends

...Robert Fultz Mrs. Kimberly Windsor English 101 Descriptive Essay 25 February, 2016 Friends If someone asks me who is the most important persons in my life, my answer would be: my family and my friends. The reason why I say this is because those are two relationships that have ever made me happy and taken care of me. In the dictionary, a friend is an acquaintance. To me a friend is someone who cherishes the special moments and memories of life with another person. Everyone has a lot of friends around the world. Even though some people might think that they have great friend but they might be wrong. To me friend will always appreciate you no matter what happens, with no expectation in return. A true friend does not try to change you because of your negative qualities. Also a friend should do things that you are passionate about with you and help you solve problems that might be difficult. Appreciation is key when it comes to friendship. If any individual does not feel appreciated in any relationship it will cause adverse effects. Friends are there to appreciate you for the beautiful and taleneted indivudla that you are. When friends do thijngs for one another whether it be finaical or supportive its nice to feel appreciated and loved. The feeling of appreciation helps the friendship grow and progress into something beautiful. A friend should not try to change you because of your negative qualities. If they try to change you, they are not worth your time. A......

Words: 376 - Pages: 2

28.12.2018 | 3 years ago Midnight Titty Madness – Katrina Jade | 12V 7A Exide Batterie Charger